Alguma vez você já parou para se perguntar por qual razão você fica tão para baixo depois de brigar com alguém?
Seja dentro ou fora de um relacionamento, se você sente que o outro é o verdadeiro culpado por todo o seu sofrimento, talvez seja muito importante você ler esse texto.
Antes de mais nada, eu tenho algumas questões a fazer a você:
Para você é difícil seguir em frente e voltar ao normal após uma discussão?
Você se sente incapaz de voltar às boas e fazer as pazes, ou sente a necessidade de manter uma distância segura por um tempo?
Se o outro tenta se reaproximar, você leva muito tempo para se conectar outra vez, ou permanece distante e até mesmo desprovida de afeição por aquela pessoa?
Existe uma voz interna que lhe diz para não deixar pra lá assim tão fácil? Ou que lhe aconselha a fazer com que o outro se esforce muito para ter sua total atenção outra vez, como se tentasse puní-lo ou sentir dor?
Se você respondeu SIM a pelo menos uma dessas perguntas, provavelmente para você é difícil desapegar do sofrimento. Talvez seja complexo superar aquilo que foi dito e feito – ou o que não o foi. De alguma forma você não se sente suficientemente amada e isso dói. Igualmente, desconfio de que você sente dificuldades em expressar gratidão e perdoar ao outro e a si própria plenamente.
Estou certa? Sim? Esse texto é para você.
Talvez as idéias que vou compartilhar possam parecer um tanto quanto radicais – e você pode até sentir vontade de parar de ler e não ter mais vontade de ler nenhum outro texto desse blog.
É exatamente por isso que deve continuar lendo.
A verdadeira razão da sua frustração
Se até aqui você se identificou com o que escrevi, possivelmente o outro não tem absolutamente nada a ver com o sofrimento que você vem experimentando.
Quando nos sentimos assim machucados e estamos plenamente convencidos de que o outro é a maior, senão a única causa de tamanho sofrimento, nós estamos projetando. Ao projetarmos acreditamos com toda a força do nosso coração que o problema é um mas, na verdade, ele é outro. No mais das vezes nós somos o problema.
A projeção acontece quando culpamos os outros por feridas antigas. E esse não é um processo consciente e deliberado. Então não há porque sentir culpa ou remorso. O que também não significa que devemos lavar as mãozinhas e deixar pra lá.
Funciona mais ou menos assim: conflitos atuais servem como gatilhos que reavivam questões mal resolvidas do passado – incluindo questões de relacionamentos antigos, da infância ou até mesmo de existências pretéritas (caso você acredite nisso).
No momento do conflito nós sentimos com o âmago do nosso ser que aquela pessoa que está ali na nossa frente é a razão de todo o sofrimento. Afinal, se ela é tudo que eu consigo ver diante dos meus olhos, quem mais poderia personificar com precisão aquilo tudo que estou experimentando?!
E aí, o que fazemos? Brigamos com toda a intensidade que a emoção pede. Falamos coisas que machucam. Tomamos atitudes precipitadas ou deliberadamente nos omitimos de fazer o que precisa ser feito. E se ainda fossemos capazes de ao menos nos sentirmos aliviados e em paz depois… mas não. Eu não sei vocês, mas eu no auge desse ciclo, uma vez sozinha, ficava repassando mentalmente cada fala. Sentia vergonha, culpa, arrependimento e não raro tinha a impressão de que havia me comportado com uma criatura irracional. A sensação do depois era, invariavelmente, ruim. Mesmo achando que o problema estava fora e que a briga ou até mesmo o término resolveriam, do lado de dentro eu ficava em frangalhos.
Você talvez esteja se perguntando, e daí? Se é inconsciente e eu não faço isso por mal, qual o problema?!
O problema é que a projeção nos previne de enxergar a verdadeira raiz do problema. Ser míope com relação a isso é como aqueles personagens dos quadrinhos que caminham, caminham, caminham, e a nuvenzinha insiste em acompanha-los. Mudam as cenas, mudam os personagens e a sombra da projeção segue firme e forte ao nosso lado: nós continuamos a caminhar lado-a-lado com sofrimento.
Quando estamos convencidos de que a culpa mora ao lado, somos incapazes de perceber como o nosso passado interfere no momento presente. Fechamos os olhos para as questões fundamentais que o outro está nos chamando a relembrar.
Como se não bastasse, a projeção impede que solucionemos essas questões, o que significa que possivelmente repetiremos o padrão tantas vezes quantas forem necessárias até olhemos para a raiz do conflito. Até que identifiquemos qual padrão é esse e porque raios continuamos mantendo a projeção, replicaremos esses conflitos no relacionamento atual, ou os levaremos conosco para os relacionamentos futuros. Ou seja, ficamos presos no pesadelo de perpetuar brigas e nos distanciamos cada vez mais da perspectiva de nos conectarmos verdadeiramente com aqueles que nos cercam.
Agora que você já entendeu que continuar nessa de projetar e achar que o problema está lá fora não leva a nada, vou contar um pouco sobre alguns exemplos de situações que podem ilustrar algumas formas que a projeção pode apresentar, quais são pensamentos, sentimentos e posturas corporais recorrentes e, ao final, o que pode ser feito para quebrar ou pelo menos minimizar esse ciclo.
Algumas formas de identificar a projeção
A certeza de que estamos certos – ao projetarmos sentimos cem por cento de certeza de que a razão mora conosco e de que o outro está completamente errado. Os sentimentos internos vão desde a ira, passando pela indignação, pela incompreensão, e terminando na indiferença. As sobrancelhas se contraem, as pálpebras se apertam e os dentes se cerram. A postura como um todo se fecha: ombros se projetam para trás enquanto os braços se cruzam, a cabeça pende para o lado. Algumas pessoas podem se virar de lado ou até mesmo dar as costas.
A certeza de que somos pequenos e errados – ao menor comentário alheio você sente como se uma flecha fosse disparada diretamente em direção ao seu peito. A sensação é de profunda inadequação, tristeza, vergonha. Possivelmente uma voz interna lhe diz que você não é suficientemente bom, belo, interessante, atraente… Fisicamente sentimos dor no peito, tendemos a nos encolher e a olhar para baixo, a sensação é de impotência e você tem a impressão de que não tem forças para nada.
A certeza de que existe uma questão de vida ou morte a ser resolvida – alguma fez você já sentiu a incapacitante sensação de ansiedade ou pânico durante uma discussão? A necessidade de que a questão deve ser encerrada aqui-e-agora caso contrário o mundo chegará ao fim? Os pensamentos costumam empurrar você a pressionar, insistir e apressar o outro chegar – e logo – a uma decisão final. Não sei se por causa da influencia da minha antiga profissão (advogada) eu tinha sensação, em discussões assim, de que uma sentença tinha que ser pronunciada ali, naquela hora, naquele momento, caso contrário o problema se perpetuaria por toda a eternidade. Além da ansiedade, a sensação interna era de inquietação, insegurança com relação ao futuro, desconfiança. O corpo se agita e tendemos a falar rápido, a andar de um lado para o outro, gesticular e mexer as mãos freneticamente.
Esses “sintomas” variam de pessoa para pessoa e eles podem se misturar e se confundir dependendo da situação. Mas se você prestar atenção, eu repeti, propositadamente a palavra “certeza”. Dentro de nós, quem projeta é uma criaturinha, na psicanálise chamada de ego ou eu inferior. Eu falarei mais sobre ele nos próximos textos, mas para já, nos importa saber apenas que o nosso ego é quem exige. Para o nosso ego o mundo é binário: sim ou não, amor ou ódio, começo ou fim, amigo ou inimigo, inferno ou paraíso.
Quando projetamos nos desconectamos completamente do outro – e de nós mesmos. Nesse cenário, o ego quer saber onde ele coloca essa sensação ruim. Existe uma necessidade de rotular, julgar, como se ao fazer isso fosse possível colocar um fim no sofrimento. Se por acaso você sentir essa demanda incontrolável pela certeza, acenda na consciência uma luz em sinal de atenção.
Como ir da projeção à conscientização em três passos
Para mim ego é como uma criança birrenta com dificuldades para lidar com a decepção. Eu ainda não tenho filhos, mas interajo bastante com crianças, e até hoje a melhor maneira que encontrei para lidar com elas de forma saudável envolve compreensão, conversas e um olhar amoroso.
Eu passei o texto inteiro falando sobre um lado do conflito, o seu. Mas não podemos nos esquecer de que quando existe disputa, existem dois lados. Se o seu lado não está se portando da melhor forma que ele poderia – a não ser que você esteja se relacionando com uma criatura muito iluminada – provavelmente o outro lado também não está. Isto significa que no limite, temos na verdade duas crianças mimadas, com dificuldade para lidar com a decepção, interagindo.
Ainda estou aprendendo mas a fórmula compreensão + diálogo + olhar apreciativo têm funcionado bem.
Compreensão – para bem compreender o outro e a si mesmo, é preciso entender onde cada um está e de onde cada um vem. Desconsiderar essas variáveis limita não apenas o exercício da empatia, mas também as potencialidades do que este relacionamento pode vir a ser. Estamos todos aprendendo e lidando com nossos próprios conflitos internos. De novo, a não ser que você esteja se relacionando com um ser de luz, ele também tem seus próprios temores e, provavelmente, chega até você com sua própria carga de cansaço mas também disposto a construir relacionamento melhor. Talvez esse movimento seja inconsciente, mas seja como for ele existe e se assim não fosse, confie em mim, vocês não estariam juntos.
Diálogo – só existe uma forma de ligar pontos que se encontram distantes: construindo pontes. Enquanto não evoluímos suficientemente para a prática ininterrupta da telepatia, conversar continua sendo o meio mais eficiente e eficaz para aproximar pessoas. Para entender de onde o outro vem, onde está e para onde ele quer ir precisamos nos comunicar. Achar que só porque vocês estão juntos existe a obrigação da adivinhação, não apenas é uma crença egoísta, mas também (pasmen!) infantil. Pessoas maduras não costumam fechar a cara e fazer voto de silêncio quando não são compreendidas. Elas também sabem que gritar e espernear para conseguirem o que querem é contraproducente e afasta a possibilidade de alcançar os resultados desejados. Se você está mirando no amadurecimento e na evolução, converse e exponha suas necessidades (falar sobre temas espinhosos pode não ser fácil, nesse texto eu falo um pouco sobre como conduzir conversas difíceis)
Olhar apreciativo – “ainda que eu falasse a língua dos homens, e falasse a língua dos anjos, sem amor eu nada seria”. São Paulo, Camões e Renato Russo não nos deixam esquecer que sem um olhar amoroso fica ainda mais complicado evoluir. Eu sei, eu sei que durante uma briga é bem complicado falar com amor. Mas tem me ajudado muito, nos momentos de choque, acionar duas premissas: (i) isso não é pessoal e (ii) o outro apesar de me contrariar não o fez por mal.
Não, eu não sou e, estou de longe de ser, um ser de luz. Mas lógica e a experiência me conduziram a prática dessas premissas:
Não levar para o lado pessoal – Seguindo a linha de raciocínio de que a raiz do nosso sofrimento não é o outro, mas nós mesmos, o que o outro faz, pensa, sente e fala, não diz respeito a nós, mas a ele mesmo. Ficou confuso agora? Se os conflitos nascem da nossa projeção, é preciso ter em mente que o outro é um ser humaninho bastante parecido conosco.
Se nós projetamos, ele também projeta.
Se somos capazes de entender que as projeções do outro nada têm a ver conosco, e sim com a história e com as experiências que ele traz em sua própria bagagem pessoal, não há porque levar suas ações para o lado pessoal. Logo, não há razões para tanto drama e sofrimento.
O outro não fez por mal – o ponto de partida desse texto é a projeção em relacionamentos afetivos. Se a todo momento você escolhe acreditar que a pessoa que está ao seu lado não age de boa-fé com você, sinto em lhe dizer, mas quem está agindo “por mal” é você mesmo.
Quando decidimos nos relacionar e construir algo com alguém é porque em nosso íntimo confiamos que estar com essa pessoa é melhor do que estar só. Se você faz esse movimento em direção a uma pessoa em quem você não confia (já que acha que quando ela lhe decepciona ela faz isso intencionalmente) você está escolhendo uma situação que é pior do que ficar sozinho, ou seja, você deliberadamente está se expondo ao sofrimento.
Nós não temos que confiar em todo mundo e, infelizmente, nós não estamos cercados apenas de pessoas boas e bem intencionadas, então se você tem razões concretas para acreditar que a pessoa que está ao seu lado quer te ferir, por amor a si mesmo, saia desse relacionamento.
Agora, se esse não é o caso. Sussurre ao seu ego que não é por mal e que assim como você o outro também está aprendendo. Todo processo de aprendizado envolve tentativas e erros. Sim, lidar com erros é uma droga. Eu não gosto. Você não gosta. O outro provavelmente também não gosta. Mas faz parte e tá tudo bem (ou vai ficar… )
Se relacionar é para quem tem coragem. Somos reciprocamente espelhos uns dos outros e quanto maior a intimidade entre duas pessoas maior a nitidez das imagens (e das dores) refletidas.
Projetar é um processo inconsciente, mas não reconhece-lo e viver de projeção em projeção, reproduzindo o mesmo ciclo de sofrimento, é uma escolha individual que pode ser revista a qualquer tempo.
***
Um novo ano se iniciou essa semana, que tal tirar um tempinho para refletir um pouco sobre o tema e identificar o que você anda projetando nos seus próprios relacionamentos?
Que tal fazer um esforço extra para fortalecer as parcerias num caminho com maior compaixão e amor?
**IMPORTANTE**: Lidar com a projeção de forma alguma significa conviver e permanecer em relacionamentos abusivos. O desenvolvimento pessoal e o convite ao autoconhecimento não se confundem com ultrapassar as barreiras do bem estar e da estima por si mesmo. Respeite seus limites e caso perceba que a situação está comprometendo de alguma forma sua integridade física, emocional e espiritual, não hesite em procurar ajuda profissional.
Muito bom texto sobre a importância de reconhecer as projeções e também sobre quão impactante um relacionamento pode ser em nosso processo de autoconhecimento.
Parabéns. ?
Oi Gustavo!
Que bom que você gostou do texto! É uma honra ter você acompanhando o blog!
Bem vindo e apareça sempre 🙂
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