Por quase cinco anos essa pergunta me assombrou. Naquela época eu trabalhava em uma grande empresa, estava bem posicionada, era reconhecida pelos meus colegas, pares e chefes, a remuneração não era nada mal. Objetivamente eu não tinha nada do que reclamar.
Até que numa bela noite meu sossego acabou e eu assisti ao bendito videozinho “All Work and All Play” (?? clique no hiperlink para assistí-lo também).
O vídeo sintetizava o que eu nem sabia que estava sentindo.
Eureka! Era isso! Tava tudo ali explicado, num video bacaninha e com um trilha sonora incrível. Finalmente eu vi o porquê da minha insatisfação mesmo eu tendo feito tudo certo: a faculdade, a pós, o emprego, a cidade maravilhosa onde morava. Entendi a dinâmica entre as gerações X, Y. A mudança de sistemas econômicos. As novas demandas da sociedade em rede. As relações líquidas. Mas não demorou muito para a alegria acabar. Não bastava saber de tudo aquilo, eu precisava encontrar uma forma de mudar aquela realidade. Era como estar apaixonada por um ser de outra galáxia.
Só naquele dia eu o assisti três vezes. Senti um misto de euforia com agonia. Inquietude. Ansiedade. Não contente em ficar incomodada sozinha, eu fiz questão de tentar incomodar os outros também. Compartilhei o dito cujo não só nas redes sociais, mas também por e-mail com as pessoas que trabalhavam comigo. Pai, mãe, irmão. Eu não me lembro agora, mas acho que até para meus chefes eu mandei.
“Are you doing right now what you really love?”. A razão de algumas noites de insônia. A expressão catalisadora minha busca. Responder a essa pergunta de forma satisfatória tornou-se uma quase obsessão.
O tempo passou. Sai daquele trabalho, daquela cidade, mudei de país, voltei pro Brasil. E a pergunta bendita me acompanhou.
Hoje, preparando um e-mail para uma coachee eu resolvi anexar esse vídeo para ajudá-la a entender uma parte do que está acontecendo no mercado de trabalho. E porque não só ela como 80% da população economicamente ativa estão incomodados com esse senso de inadequação, cansaço e insatisfação crônica.
Resolvi assistí-lo pela enésima vez. E, pela primeira, eu senti algo diferente. Apenas hoje, janeiro de 2016, eu me dei conta de que finalmente me libertei da maldição da pergunta.
Você tem paixão pelo que está fazendo agora?
S-I-M
Demorei quase 1825 dias para chegar a essa resposta – isso sem contar os dias em que ignorava que essa pergunta habitava minha alma. E dentre o mar de dúvidas e questionamentos que fizeram companhia a essa interrogação, encontrei uma certeza: sozinha e sem orientação muito provavelmente eu ainda estaria oscilando entre a automedicação com álcool e festinhas; doses homeopáticas de exercício físicos quando dava tempo; recompensas fugazes; férias eufóricas; meritocracia pelo consumo; cansaço inesgotável; crises inflamadas de reclamação; e, claro, baldes e mais baldes de café para manter o corpo acordado enquanto a mente dormia.
Até quando eu seria capaz de aguentar? Sinceramente, eu não sei. Mas com a orientação certa da pessoa certa, eu fui mais rápido e mais longe.
E você? Você tem paixão pelo que está fazendo agora? Do que você precisa para encurtar a distância entre saber que precisa mudar e protagonizar a mudança?
Lucila Lobo
медицинская справка
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